How I stopped punishing myself emotionally

Posted by on Oct 24, 2015 in Life | 0 comments

How I stopped punishing myself emotionally

I used to beat myself up emotionally if things didn’t go the way I planned.

When I didn’t get the outcome I wanted at work, the results I wanted at university, when friends and family didn’t understand my point of view, when I ate something unhealthy, the list goes on and on..

But I have put an end to this self punishment.  The answer was simple: I do my best.

I even do my best to always do my best!

That cliched line our parents used give us is in fact invaluable, and a release from so much pain.

When you do your best it’s not possible to be disappointed, angry or upset with yourself, because you did everything you could. This philosophy applies to everything in life.

I like this because the responsibility is on ourselves, something I have written about previously.

Doing your best means you have done all that you can.

However, you can only do what is within your control.

If you are working on a group project and you do your best but the rest of the group don’t, you still won’t get a good outcome.  But you will be at peace with yourself, knowing you did your best.

Our best will change depending on the conditions.  My best late at night when I am tired and emotional is not as good as my best when I am fresh in the morning, and that’s ok.

Do the best you can in the circumstances.

When I would do a gym class if I couldn’t keep up with everyone else I would feel frustrated and like I wasn’t good enough.  Now I ask myself ‘did you do your best?’ and if the answer is yes I am happy because I couldn’t have worked any harder.

Feelings of frustration, guilt, regret and judgement cannot be inflicted on yourself when you have done your best.

Instead, feelings of satisfaction, acceptance, contentment and pride are felt.  You will like yourself!

When we don’t like who we are we subconsciously hurt ourselves as punishment.  We tell ourselves we aren’t good enough, we aren’t deserving, that we are a bad person.

An honest answer of ‘I did my best’ will set you free.

If you do your best you cannot judge yourself, you cannot have regrets – there was nothing more you could have done.

Doing your best doesn’t mean doing things perfectly and not making mistakes. You will make mistakes, learn from them and move forward.  It will be ok that you made a mistake, because you did your best!

Make doing your best a habit.  Start now.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *